Little Girls Living in a Women's World

In my own way, when I was little I tried to be more grown up. I wanted to wear mommy's shoes (although I don't think my mom has ever worn heels), I wanted to put on her lipstick, try on grandma's wigs, and prance around with a bra stuffed with socks on. I would put on a pretty dress and get my hair curled. I wanted my nails painted now and again. 

I find myself doing these things with my daughters now as a mom. I give them the prettiest dresses, I curl their hair, I never hesitate to paint their nails, and yes, I have let them try on mommy's bra. None of these things have I ever found to be out of the realm of things I would allow my daughters to do.

Lately, I have been doing some shopping (ok, some is a slight underestimation) for my children's fall and winter attire. I have been bargain shopping via garage sales, the Salvation Army, and Goodwill.  I even bought them some cute clearence tennis shoes at the Wal-Mart, and some dress shoes at Family Dollar. (Yes, I bought them 2 inch heels which I am about to bash myself ever so slightly) As I hold the attire up to my children to see if it looks like the right size, I began to notice some things.

Girls clothes are short. Yes, I understand that they are just kids and men are not supposed to see a short skirt on a 5 year old as a sexual attraction, but some molesters may.  Far worse than the molesters however, is what my daughters have begun to expect to wear and their reasoning behind it. My daughter prefer the short/tight clothing. When asked why they explaining that it's normal, in style, and it makes them look pretty. Look pretty compared to what? I am not one to brag but my 3 little girls are absolutely gorgeous! Manda is very tan, slim, huge blue eyes, so she has thin hair and still not a lot of it, she's pretty. Sydney has white/blonde hair, freckles, porcelain skin and better muscle tone in her arms then some high school athletes. Finally, Skye has the biggest green eyes you've ever seen, an amazing smile, and full thick brown hair.

So in other words my beautiful girls are already under the impression that their clothing can make them look ugly faster than a bad attitude, uncombed hair, or being dirty. I have learned the styles that are in as to avoid the awful unpopular experience of my elementary years which carried on through school, since while I love my parents, neither has much in the way of fashion sense. My kids wear all the name brands, they are extremely well and cheaply dressed. They are so well-dressed that many assume we have money. I have never been upset to dress them as the other children are dressing until lately.

Why are they making belly shirt for little girls? Why are their short all made with a one inch inseam? Why do they have mini skirts for toddlers? What's next, thong underwear in a  size 2T? I bought them some low-rise jeans, some tank tops, even a bikini or two, but a mom has to draw a line somewhere. My daughters are not sex objects. Their worries should be which color of crayons to use, being on time for the bus, if they remember to brush their teeth, or what their snack will be. They should not be concerned with what they where aside from which character is on it, or what color it is.

They even have real children's make-up now. I know that one day my girls will wish to hide behind make-up to help diminish personal insecurities as all women do. That day should be long after their 14th birthday when they still have no idea what potential they have or power they hold, but want feel like a woman. No one can get back the years of hotness they experience prior to having kids or turning 30. If I knew how pretty I was back then I wouldn't be where I am at now!

Sketchers even makes shape-ups for kids. (You know that shoe that is supposed to tone your legs and butt) They advertise it as being being in shape, but really we all know it's aimed at the slightly chunky 7 year old that has already come on board the self-destructive cycle of being teased. At 7 I can't remember anyone being made fun of for their weight. Today, my kids will just tell you if you are fat. (Kids, especially mine, don't lie about this matter) Some company even makes padded bikinis for when your 6 year old's breasts just aren't big enough. I'm all for my kids being excited about one day having boobs, although on a personal note to all little girls, bras and periods should not in any way be looked forward to. If I have to hear them ask one more time when they can have boobies though, I may just sue the entertainment industry.

Right now I am wearing size 9 pants. Ok, so it's bigger than I like. I want to be a six again, but I am experiencing some medical issues that cause me to be bloated. According to the modeling industry, size 6 is fat! You have to be a 2 to even be considered for anything but a plus-size model. Why? Most men I know find skinny girls to be too skinny. They like having a butt to admire and natural cleavage. I want my girls to know that they can look good at any size with the proper clothing. (Yes, I believe some clothes should come with a weight limit) Belly shirts and bikinis don't look good on everyone. That's why they have tankinis and one piece bathing suits and cover-ups if you're still to fat. If you are fat, I suggest you use them. I won't sugar coat it and tell you to embrace your fat rolls. I have to look at you. I wouldn't wear a bikini, so please do me the same favor.

At the same token, my 5 and 4 year olds should not worry that they ate too much ice-cream, that their birthday cake will go straight to their thighs, or that they need to work out everyday to burn off the unwanted calories they are consuming. They should be little girls. They aren't supposed to be sexy! (really what parent wants their girls to grow up and be sexy?) They are supposed to be girls.

I leave you with this: Build your daughter's self-esteem. Tell her daily she is beautiful. Congratulate her on her successes. Tell her you love her so the first boy that comes along and says it to her won't get laid.  Teach her about nutrition, but don't make it a concern or the center of her life. Dress her appropriately, you buy the clothes so send a message to the clothing makers. These are our little girls, raise them right.