The following is how a single mom goes grocery shopping with five kids ages 7, 4, 4, 3 and 5 months. While the accounts are true and very honest the author takes no responsibility for those that try this at home. That's right, try this at your own risk. Possibly start smaller and work your way up.
Two words: baby carrier. This is the single most important part of my journey. It keeps my baby safe, his toys are easy to attach, and it fits easily on the cart. It begins on the ride to the store, baby in car seat/carrier, kids in coats and comfortable shoes after all going potty, (I could care less if they have to, they are going), and so we begin the list of rules as we drive to the grocery store.
My kids know this list and can repeat it to you if asked. In the parking lot we stay by mom holding hands. Not in front of mom or behind mom, but it must be beside. This discourages running ahead or lagging slowly behind.
Once in the store mommy will get the cart. I prefer the ones with the cars so two additional kids can be strapped down. (evil laughter here) The other two are then forced to hold one side of the cart each and can help me not have to bend over by grabbing lower foods.
Next, shopping with a list is not a Nel thing. I NEVER shop with a list. Lists mean that if I forget something I would have to go back for it. That is not happening. I simply look at prices about 80 times while in the store. We always buy the best priced item unless it is something that tastes terrible when it's generic. Certain frozen foods are like that. We also watch because bigger doesn't always mean better deal. Sometimes two of the smaller package is a better value. Yes, I do cover all this with my kids and talk to them about prices openly in the store.
While we are shopping the children know they may request any fruit, vegetable, meat (except maybe lobster tail or crab legs), or whole wheat pasta. They each may also pick out one healthy snack food. Cheese, whole grain crackers, baked chips, or yogurt are all acceptable choices. Ultimately, if it's out of season, cost some crazy amount, or has added sugars, we probably won't buy it. I am usually pretty reasonable on this.
My kids know me reasonably well. If they can go through the entire store, keep their hands to themselves, no whining, no crying, no complaining, and most importantly not insulting anyone, they may get a beverage of their choice at the end of the trip or a candy bar.
The whole not insulting a stranger came into play one day shortly after my grandmother had passed. My oldest son was 5 at the time. He walked up to an elderly lady and stated, "You are old. That means you will die soon." I can still feel the color drain out of my face to this day from him saying that. I hate apologizing for my kids, but at the same time I knew that he was not lying, and because I had always said don't lie and never covered the part about not being blunt, it had to be my apology.
That incident created another rule, "Only speak when spoken to, and always be polite (in other words only say nice things)". Believe me when I say everyone and I mean EVERYONE speaks to us. If I had a dollar for every time someone said, "My, you have your hands full" I would easily be a thousandaire. I also get a lot of "You have a basketball team."
I always make sure to have my kids clean and well dressed when we go out or I find myself the victim of abusive words. I don't need to know about your tax money funding my family, that I had to have a litter, that I am stereotypical trailer trash, or that I should stop breeding. A lot of people ask if I am done. Yes, I am. My tubes are very much so tied, but it's not your business.
When we do go out in nice clothes and well groomed I think the one thing that bothers me the most is the comment, "You must have a lot of help at home." You see, I have zero help at home. If I state this fact, people hand me money. (I am not kidding) It's embarrassing and makes me want to cry. We are not a charity case. Clearly, my kids are taken care of. If they ask about the dad and I tell the story (I have done this twice and must say never again) I get hugs and they cry. WTH!!! So simply I just wear my engagement ring from baby daddy when I go out and want to avoid stupid people and stupid questions.
I spend more time answering questions then we ever do shopping. The clerks know us by name at the local Kroger. They always inquire about their activities and tell them how big they are getting. Seriously, it's like you can't miss my family.
At the end of the trip no one gets their treat until all the groceries have been put away. We do that as a family, eat our treat and go about the rest of the days business. We spend an average of an hour each time we go into the store. If you have further questions, consult my facebook.
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